SuzGriffin

I haven’t lost any weight….still. I feel like crapola (stomach pain, dull ache, back ache….etc…) but the doctors say my blood tests and ultrasound are normal. Okay. I don’t FEEL normal. Plus, the doctors told my dad he only has a few weeks to live. He’s losing his battle with cancer after two years. So…in the scheme of things, who cares if I’m a fat whale? Really? There are worse things.

So I sort of cheated at my weigh in this morning. I got on the scale the first time and it said 183. Okay….no weight loss, but no gain. So I stepped on it again. It said 184.4. Um…no. So I stepped on it again! 184.4. Hmmmmmmmm……. So, of course, I chose to stick with the first weight since it didn’t make me feel like a complete failure, just sort of like one. Is that wrong? It probably is. But hey, at least I admitted my wrongdoing right?

I went to a Superbowl party last night and there was NO healthy food there. What the?!?!? I guess I should have brought veggies and dip. I didn’t eat all that bad, but there WAS the birthday cake I made for my friend that was triple chocolate chocolate chip yumminess. *sigh* Oh well. On to another week!

I can’t stop raiding the pantry after 9:00. When I stopped eating after 9:00 a few months ago and watched my carb intake at the same time, I lost 4 pounds in one week alone. I’ve GOT to knock it off! I don’t know what my deal is. I can’t stop. It’s an addiction. I say to myself, “NO!” but I don’t listen. Why not? I don’t know. What’s my DEAL? I can’t exercise for another couple of months after I heal from my knee surgery so I’ve got to step up the watching-what-I-eat thing. Ugh. It’s so hard! Especially when I’m home all day with the kiddos. And I’m sick of water. I love water normally but then I go through stages where I get sick of it. I’ve got to try adding some sort of fruit to it to make it more exciting. Ugh. I’m in a slump already and I just STARTED!!!

So I had already joined BuddySlim a while ago after I had my first little guy. But then came pregnancy and little boy #2. (Oops! Surprise!) Here I am, 183 pounds and not-so-happy about the way I look. Yes, I am a whopping 30 pounds lighter than I was after I had my first son but I still need to lose a good 20-30 pounds. I signed up again because I want a fresh new start! I used to do Weight Watchers but right now we are trying to save money so I am trying to lose weight on my own. We’ll see how that goes. I LOVED Weight Watchers but I know I can do it on my own. All things are possible through Christ! (He is my rock…) I can’t exercise right now so that’s a big fat bummer because I LOVE to exercise. But I have a bum knee thanks to an old soccer injury roaring its ugly head. I’m getting arthroscopic surgery on it in February and have to wait 4-6 weeks after that to exercise seriously. Right now, I just need SOME accountability at least (hence BuddySlim) so that I don’t go rummaging through the pantry at 10:00 at night anymore. ARGH! I’ve GOT to stop that!!!!!
I just turned 30 and have done some re-evaluating of my goals and dreams. This year, I’m going to work on self-improvement. I’m working on the outside and the inside. So bring it on!!!! Here I go again!!